On relationships, sexuality

The disabled community still waits for our 1960s sexual revolution 
Allan Hennessy, The Guardian, 26 June 2016
Born with a debilitating spinal disability, 53-year- old Frenchman Marcel Nuss, met his first wife, Gaby, in hospital as he battled for his life at the age of 22. Now divorced, he lives with his partner, Marie, and his two children in the leafy suburbs of Strasbourg. “I often had comments like ‘Oh, he’s a bit ugly’,” Marie reveals in Disability and Sexuality: Exploring the Intimacy Option, a documentary exploring the interplay between disability and sexual liberation ...

Let's take the initiative to start a sexual revolution for people with disabilities 
Servaas Kamerling, The Guardian, 14 July 2016
We need to push the boundaries and create new role models to push the barriers of acceptance and normality around disability and sex ... Let’s not wait for the revolution, let’s create it and see the barometer rise.

Report on the Australian Youth with Disability National Forum: Promoting Sexual and Reproductive Health and Rights

Australian Cross-Disability Alliance, February 2016

In November 2015, the Australian Cross Disability Alliance (ACDA) ...  hosted a national forum of young people with disability on the theme of sexual and reproductive rights ... as part of an exciting and innovative global project being established by the United Nations, to improve the human rights of young people with disability worldwide – particularly their sexual and reproductive rights and their right to freedom from violence ...

Why shouldn't individuals with a learning disability be in a relationship?
Rebecca Wallett, Nursing Times, 5 July 2016
Learning disability branch editor, Rebecca, was shocked to find that individuals close to her were unaware that a disability does not change a person’s desire and right to be in a relationship ...

Letter to editor, Australian Women's Weekly, August 2016:

The Dateables story about people having relationships that are important to us all was wonderful. The maturity shown by the couples in what they considered in what it takes to be a good partner and their understanding and consideration of each others abilities, brought tears to my eyes. Many couples today could take a leaf out of their book. Liz Dore has done a wonderful thing providing this service.  K. Bart, Newcastle

Link for Insight: Sex and Disability at SBS 'On Demand'

If you missed last night's episode of Insight, you can watch it online via SBS On Demand:

Sex And Disability
Insight: Season 2016 Episode 10
How do you negotiate sex with a serious disability? What are the physical, intellectual, financial, legal and emotional barriers? How do you make it work, particularly with disabled teenagers? How can you properly express your sexuality? This week, Insight is look at two issues that are definitely not mutually exclusive: sex and disability. 
Hosted by award-winning journalist Jenny Brockie. Tuesday 12th April, 8:30pm SBS (An SBS Production) 

Disability and sexuality

In the lead-up to tonight's episode of Insight, on Sex and Disability, SBS TV (8.30pm), SBS News published this article about the Rainbow Bridge Social Club:

Coming out on being gay with a disability
Madeleine King, SBS News, 8 April 2016
When Charitha de Silva was 15 years-old, he came to is adoptive mother Mary McMahon to tell her, quite simply, the he was gay and wanted a boyfriend.  It wasn't much of a surprise ...

Sex and disability: SBS Insight, Tuesday 12 April

Sex for both people with physical and intellectual disability will be discussed in this episode of Insight:

How do you negotiate sex with a serious disability?

Tuesday, April 12, 2016 - 20:30
SBS One

Imagine - you’ve been married to your partner for 25 years. You live with them, love them, are sexually attracted to them, but physical intimacy? Almost impossible. 

This is the reality for David and Jenni Heckendorf, who both have profound cerebral palsy that greatly limits their mobility. In order to have sex, they must use the services of a sex worker; a process of extreme trust, vulnerability and financial cost.
They lobbied to use their NDIS funding to access their sex worker, but others are restricted by state laws and regulations around sex work. 

Rachel Wotton is one such sex worker, who works with clients with physical and intellectual disabilities.

What if your child had an intellectual disability? How do you teach them about all the nuances of sex and sexuality: consent, attraction, pleasure, emotion, consequences?
Mary McMahon has helped her gay son negotiate porn. Jarrod McGrath teaches sex-ed classes for children with intellectual disabilities. 

And what happens, if and when kids come along? What is the most ethical course of action? 

This week, Insight is looking at two issues that are definitely not mutually exclusive: sex and disability.

Rainbow Bridge Social Club

More 'rainbow' headlines, but this endeavour is local, and has a very different aim, with a similarly serious intent:

Rainbow Bridge: Mother and son start social club for LGBTQI youth with intellectual disabilities

Lucy Carter, The World Today, (ABC Radio) 20th October 2015

For many teenagers who come out as gay, working out how to start their first same-sex relationship can be a difficult process to navigate. For young people with an intellectual disability, it is even harder.

One mother and her teenage son are trying to make this experience easier for young people in New South Wales by starting up the state's first LGBTQI social club for 16 to 26 year olds with intellectual disabilities ...

Relationships and Private Stuff commented on Facebook with more information:

... Rainbow Bridge social club ... will start in late January 2016. The project is funded by My Choice Matters - The NSW Consumer Development Fund and supported by FRANS in Croydon and Twenty 10 in Chippendale.  

If interested in the social group and workshop rainbowbridgesocialclub@gmail.com

New resources on sexuality/sex education and assessing consent

New additions to the growing body of good quality information and resources about sexuality education designed to specifically meet the needs of those with intellectual disability are always welcome.  These two are the latest to come to our notice, both are freely available:

Sexuality education is vital for teens with intellectual disabilitiesLeslie Walker-Hirsch, Expert Beacon
... Many parents ask, “Does my child really need sexuality education?” The answer is an emphatic yes. A person with a cognitive, intellectual or developmental disability needs the same information about sexuality that everyone else needs in order to be a safe, healthy and responsible member of the community. This article provides first steps for parents and teachers--and clears up some misunderstandings about social and sexual development of individuals with intellectual disabilities ...

The release of a useful and necessary new assessment tool was announced on Dave Hingsburger's blog, Rolling Around in My Head, yesterday:  

Two agencies, Vita Community Living Services and The Centre for Behaviour Health Science, have worked together since November 23 of 2012 to create a new assessment tool: The Assessment of Levels of Knowledge - Sexuality and Consent (TALK-SC).  

The tool can be used as a pre/post test for sex education or relationship training classes. It also can be used to determine if a person with an intellectual disability can give consent in the area of sexuality and relationships.   

The tool is designed such that if someone, undergoing a consent assessment, does not pass, the score will give information that will allow education to be pinpointed to the exact areas of need. TALK - SC will be released tomorrow, free of charge.  

Any clinician, educator or agency who wishes a copy of the assessment tool may simply request one by sending an email to dhingsburger@vitacls.org

The Down Syndrome NSW members' library holds several books and videos useful for supporting sex/relationship education for people with Down syndrome from an early age.

• To contact Jo at the library, ph. 9841 4410, or email library@dsansw.org.au